Letter to Myself

Hello Little Guy,

You may not be able to read this for a few years, but it is important that I send you this now. This is a good time for you—life is good. You do not yet know about the hardships and trials that life can sometimes throw at you, the dips and valleys. Right now, life is sunshine, warm, and happy—as it should be.

The author as a boy

In about 30 years from now you will go through a life-changing event—the birth of your first child, a daughter. She will make you change the way you look at everything. She will be a tiny life that you can nestle in your hands. A couple of years later, as if that was not an epic event in itself, you will have another child, this time a son. He will alter your life as well, making you rethink everything you thought you knew in the last two years. Again, the universe will open up and smile upon you and life will be miraculous.

What I really want to tell you, is that in about 30 years, when these children enter your life and elevate you into fatherhood, it will ease what you will go through in the 30 years up to that point. Simply said, those 30 years will be difficult. There will be high points, but also dips and valleys, in fact, many dips and valleys. The reason?  Your own father won’t be there.

I know that this is hard to tell you, now, as you are there, happy, sitting beautifully in the sun. But it may save you years of frustrations and let downs. There will be others that will fill-in the best they can, it will not be the same, but it will help.

So why tell you? Why give you this hurtful news? Because there will be a great reward to those years of struggling, years of feeling alone and not having someone to talk to, years of trying to figure out what you are going through: you will become a father yourself. In the moment each of your children are born, you will become their father. You will be Daddy. And the 30 years of frustrations will begin to fade.

You will know what to do, how to act and how to be the best father in the world. You will be there from the moment they are born. You will serve them breakfast each morning and tuck them in every night. You will bandage and tend to their scrapes and bruises, celebrate their every happiness and hold them tight when they are sad. You will love them with a love that you never knew you had.

And the 30 years will not matter. You will become strong from enduring those dips and valleys. You will be saved by two small precious children. Their love will heal you.

Tuck this away and read it during the hard times. It will all pass soon. Hang in there. That moment is racing toward you.

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Filed under Creative, OpEd, Parenting

4 responses to “Letter to Myself

  1. What a wonderful letter. I wish your childhood self could have read it. But hen maybe you wouldn’t have learnt the lessons that made you such a perceptive father today.

  2. This is so precious. So happy that you have been blessed with two great kids that I get to read about!

  3. Heartbreaking and beautiful.

  4. The experiences in your life, both good and bad, made you the amazing person you are today. You have a zest for life that is hard to find and I’m blessed to be able to call you a friend!

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